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Monday, November 30, 2009

Freshman

Hee. Freshman tu xde apa, saja letak which means first year. which is the first year of me with him. It was a lot of chaos and fights, tapi about 1%. the other portions are filled with laughters and ckp mrepek. A year with him felt so short, rase mcm baru semalam nmpk die pegi depan stage amek hadiah from cikgu bilogy sbb dpt a. and rs mcm baru smlm nmpk die lalu depan mata ngn ayah time hari pendaftaran kt upm. haha. time tu klaka, sbb time tu tgh lepak2 dgn mama bwh kemah, usha2 org lalu lalang, sibuk cr laki hot kt tmpt baru. and mcm ade jodoh, nmpk die lalu, mase tu die mcm dtg lmbt kot. haha. slambe je dtg lmbt dgn beg nike die ngn ayah. time tu kecoh2 ckp kt mama bdak tu same kuliah kt matrik. hm. sape sangke kn, budak yg jmpe skali 2 tu yg jd teman hidup smpai skang. Mungkin mmg da lame dpn mata, da lame diplan utk jmpe, tp tnggu masa je nk kenal n fall in love. tak sampai 2minggu kt upm, da kenal. sebab, Malam Tunas Budaya 2008.

Kami xrpt pun tme tu, sama je mcm kenal bdak2 lain kt mtb, tapi die mmg friendly la, sdar2 je da cek2 hp masing2. kononnya cek lagu kt hp die la, pdhal tgk sume bende haha. Funny. Time nmpk gamba die celebrate bday ngn kak nad, entah kenapa jealous. Rs mcm ala melepas, die ni da ade awek rupanya. Hmph. haha. bila tanya, awek ehh. tak die ckp. kakak angkat. dlm hati, YE la tu, ade awek ngaku je. player kot sbb xngaku. hehe. tapi pelik, player2 pun byk lagu nasyid kt hp. HEKK. time tu xde la buruk sangka sgt, maybe mmg btul2 kakak angkat n die ni bdak baik sbb lagu nasyid bertimbunnn. andd. lagu boy band! hehe. xckp pun boy band tu teruk. tp mcm pelik la, guys kn slalu dgn rock bands. hm, mmg lain dr lain.
Then, mlm MTB, he, suddenly mssged me good luck. weird. but that really made me happy and kinda got the hint. maybe he likes me? sbb sepanjang practise mtb tu mmg slambe la kwn. siap penah tego mendada byk skit time jadi pempuan nakhoda kapal tu. segan gile time tu kne mendada dpn byk laki yg tgh tgk. cih, siot, seb baek mtb n org xbwat muke pelik. anyways, after that kenal2. kes halimi, then rpt balik thru the help off ghaaann. haha. thank you so much, u helped a lot. first date, time ikan bakar. hehe, time tu awkward kot. xigt sgt, yg igt, sepak die sbb ape tah haha. tkejut muke die time tu. maybe xbiase kne sepak ngn pmpuan? hhe. msty la, sape biase kn. pape pun, lps tu makin rpt n cple.
Orite, bout couple. masa tu anjing menyalak and perasaan haru biru sbb xsure. but i dont know why, i pushed myself. i keep on telling myself just grab the guy! or else ure gonna lose him. mcm desperate? tp rasa mcm xnk pk byk kali. rs mcm time tu nk trime je and try. taknak hesitate, nanti la cple, mggu dpn ke ape. xnk cmtu. rs mcm hes good enough for me to accept je time tu. which i dont know that maybe its not a good thing to do since im not ready? but today. i realize that IT DOESNT MATTER WEH. i need to remind myself that from now on. cause, it doesnt matter when the relationship starts, lmbt skit ble ready ke. main cple bile nk ke. sama je kan. its the same person. i like him, he likes me. dah la. fullstopppp haha. sadly, in that 1year, i kept on saying i regret that moment where i accepted him to early. sbb back then, i havent realize yet that its not a big deal pun. kapel lmbt ke cpt ke, sama je. flirting lame2 pun, kapel jgak. flirting skejap pun, sama je. yg penting memories after that. fortunately, he made me realize the truth. i shudnt regret that, it was the start of us, knape nk regret kn. problem je aku ni. mesti sbb ragu2 la nih. xabes2. pdhal da elok sgt da, nk hesitate ape lg.
The thing is, i always hesitate on things. lps beli something, rs mcm salah pilih. lepas ape2 pun xconfident. he said that im lack of self confidence? maybe la kot. mcm betul kn. and maybe i just dont have the right faith. im just too curious. too teliti smpai takut nk amek risk and believe on things. takut nk accept things that i nvr encounter b4? ntah. wtvr it is, i dont wanna do it again. i feel that its unfair to him? just bcause i dont trust myself, doesnt mean that i cant trst him kn. plus hes been the most trustable person in earth skang ni, other than my parents. hw cud i not just be confident and live with him for the rest of my fucking breaths kn. cuak sgt jmpe org yg lg better and tgglkn die. pdhal u know it urself that u wud never ever ever find anyone better than him. obvious kot. weh, sape je kt dunia ni yg pnah bwat cmtu. even ur friends pun xde mcm tu dpt. apprciate laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. allah. ape la problem sbenarnya. tp bile pk2 balik, rs mcm xde masalah. da jmpe, dia baik. im not, really. so try to be la. for his sake. for everyones sake. plus, i shud stop being selfish. no. not really right. i believe i shud stop being careless of other people. stop thinking that its all about me. 70% that its about other ppl. just 30% about me? bleh ke cmtu. possible ke. haih. i shud do this. i must. cuz if i try, i know ill be a better person. hw can i be a doctor if i dont give a damn abt other ppl. unless org tu menangis n merayu2 baru nk kesian, halahai, kesian patient aku. i shud think more la abt other ppl. life is nt abt me. confirm. its abt me annnddd others. penatnya type. bile nk tido ni.
pape pun. im just so happy about our anniversary. i mean. honestly. i know im a little bit (10%) dissapointed abt the bag. but seriously, i shudnt be that demanding la. its a sembonia bag worth 400something. why shud i be complaining. just because im obsessed over guess bags, doesnt mean that other bags arent worth hundreds of money. kan? plus, mama gave paris hiltons bag, i complained also at first, then later suke plak sgt2. xconsistent btul aku ni, mcm pulsatile secretion of hormones. wtvr it is, its a beautiful bag. white. with cantik gilaaaaaa keychain dia. and dpt bag free kaler hitam, bag yg go green blabla kinda bag. cun! and pastu dpt perfumee. wood! yayay. suka suka! suka suka suka! wangi. and lagi suka sbb sama brand dgn die. besh. mcm dulu2 same brand due2 pkai ck. besh. pastuu. yg buat menangis. dpt album! peeeeenuhhh gamba kitorg. sume gamba dlm masa 1tahun ni. plg sebak time tgk gamba isabell n iskandar. rs mcm tgk lambang cinta. mcm, eventho ktorg punye relationship, tp die bole ade thought utk letak gamba anak2 kitorg. gila la. sgt menyebakkan. time tu da meleleh air mata. haha. bagusnya laki mcm ni. xpenah dijumpa org. mcm alien dtg dr langit, menyerupai manusia and hati mcm putih berlian permata dlm sarung siput. and rmbt yg hot haha. pastu. hehe. yg paling comel, cincin! hehe. comel, agak kejantanan tapi cantik sbenarnya. mule2 td mmg aku pun yg ternampak n suke. pastu bile da pkai cm ragu2. pastu suke balik. gile psycho, sakit jiwe afiq melayan. tp sbenarnya konklusinya mmg btul2 suke la ring ni. da la same size jari. jodo xjodo kn? hehe. but lain skit je la sbb die nk lg slesa. 16mm and 16.5mm. ape lg. hoh! baru tau td die pakat ngn yog, dodi and mamaaaaaa. mama tipu. konon2 ade pakcik gas nk dtg rmah. patutlah pakai tudung cantik2. kalau pakcik gas dtg, slalu slekeh je. peh. tpuuu! rupanya yog ngn dodi nk anta hadiah. afiq la ni plan suprise2 cmni. time bday dulu si ira jadi mangsa kne angkat sangkar rabbit naik tingkat 4 haha. pelik betul. haha klakar. kesian yog ngn dodi kne tunggu lama, time turun tu tudung lak buat hal. kne lama skit siap. haha. thanks la kt dorg sbb sanggup tlg afiq. xpe, next time ktorg tlg je korg balik okeh. ala mcm korg bace pun. xpe. niat dpt phale haha. hmm.

pastu td g klcc la beli rings kt mimosa, tapi name die skang ape tah bausch ape tah. tu lepas lnch kt madam kwans. mkn bende biase je. dgn org sebelah bergosip mcm kretapi, gosip mahathir ngn najib sume kuar. ape la dorg ni. memekak. afiq smpai jatuh2 pisau haha. aku smpai berjanggut kuah pasta bolognese. pastu smayang, rayau2. tgk cite ninja assasin. mata sepet betul rain tu. ape lah si mas suke sgt. tapi hot la jgak kdg2. hmph. biase je la. tuka muke ngn afiq lg bagus. haha. nway pastu dinner kt restoran seafood ptrajaya. gelap seh. mcm laluan tmpt kne rogol haha. sengal je. gelap gelita mcm ade vampire pun bole. rupanya tu laluan belakang restoran tu. so mkn2. lauk ketam 60inggit, ceh mahal. susah nk mkn tp comel afiq mkn cm bdak kecik. mcm mama, suke mkn ketam. udang pun syedap. paling sedap, laaammmbb ribs. huh. then mkn eskrim n air juice biase la. then blah balik umah. haha. mama kantoikan ade hadiah dlm bilik. then terjadilah sesi bukak hadiah sorg2 dlm bilik smbil afiq kt luar tgh on9. comel. terharu sgt. rasa mcm nak kahwin je terus ngn laki kt luar tu. baik sgt smpai xnk hesitate lg. rs mcm nk kahwin je. even klau hesitate pasni pun at least da kawin. ciom je mulut xhesitate da. skang xleh ciom lg. so cm klau hesitate xleh wat pape hahahaha. gtl. eih da la. nk tido. yayay dpt cincin! pfume wanggeeeeeee. nk mimpi kawin. esok dating. esok esok esok, xboringnye. boring skit2 je sbb xbetul otak klau xmkn n xsmayang n xngaji. haish. byk polong ikut la ni. bodo antu, gi la ikut org laen. ok byee. saye syg afiq sgt2. nak kahwin.