wake up alarm. emergency!

The cons and cons (no pros)

•  i forgot EVERYTHING. i cant even remember some of my lecturers name, inikan ape dorang ajar!
• im doomed. screwed. 
• i dont even remember most of the medical terms anymore. oh hey, patient tu kne angin ahmar ke, eh asthma kot? oh hm ok. xde la seteruk ni. tp confirm byk gile yg lupa. hari tu pg skola, dorg ckp psl bcg, pastu aku tanya bcg yg mana eh. afiq ckp utk elak tb tu. aku bole plak buat muka mcm uh? tb? uhh. mana eh. lepas setgh jam bru dpt teka. OHHH YANG KAT PARU2 TU!
• sheesh. anyway,
• 3rd year, which means, more hardwork, more books, more pressure
• more difficult form of examination
• more fierce lecturers, more standing up and berebut2 nk tengok patient (what i experienced from ece)
• wake up at around 5am every day for 3 months, shower in a cold shower with small bathroom with no mirror or shelf. not including the dirtiness, the absence of light, oh and memandangkan satu rumah group b, not that im complaining (i love it that all my housemates are in the same group with me), but everyone will be queing untuk mandi. haih.
• need to iron (this could be done during the weekends), umm need to wear formal clothes: baju kurung or blouses or shirt + non jeans.
• tudung plak. mcm mane nak pakai stethoscope? aku pkai tudung indon tu kang aggg. xle trime. (and confirm2 shawl xle, mane nak cucuk, buat lubang kt tlinge bleh ak?)
• no more comfy flip flops, just shoes (melecetlah kaki, berparutlah kaki)
• 6.30: need to take bus to hkl, long journey. (i just hope i can fall asleep in the bus) -note to self, dont sit far behind, itll be too bumpy to sleep.
• arrived at, god knows when. have to walk from grand seasons to hkl. oh kenapa xturunkn kt hkl je? then, need to wait some more.
• i dont even know when do i get the chance to have breakfast (pling suck)
• during rounds, confirm: will be standing up and walking the whole time. 
• feelings: tired. annoyed. starving. rasa nak terberak. panas. nak pitam. bengang. sial. homicidal mode. confirm ada.
• hkl itu panas. (pakai labcoat lagi) kena bwk bnde2 alah mcm stethoscope lagi. pen, buku. segala kejadah hp, purse.
• will be at hkl from morning till evening. probably 5/6pm
• xde recess break, balik bilik/pegi library for a nap anymore.
• food will be more expensive, and need to queue laaagi panjang (kntin hkl sesak) tapi lg byk choice of food la ;DD
• less free time. less movies, less karaoke, no shopping spree anytime i want, no regular meet up with old friends. less last minute plans of hanging out with coursemates. (hm maybe ada)
• ade ke masa nak fb? men game? :((
• confirm sesetgh akan ckp, 'malas la nk keluar, duit xde la, aku ade keje' and lagi satu group yg slalu ajk kuar plak akan ckp 'alah asik busy je ko ni'  hmmph.
• ill be ketinggalan for all the gossips between my old friends. yang dah bercerai berai dah ada balak baru, baru dan lagi baru. mesti dpt tau lambat.

and i dont know what else, ps: im not being pessimist, im being realistic.

 
oh hell. at least im not going through this alone. with him being there, and friends. anythings possible. kan? insyallah. but im sure, along the way there will be so much swear words, saat2 cuak dan pengecut, cranky moods, tahap mengutuk paling gaban and everything thats not pretty. i hope all that wont kill me.
tolongla dpt dr baik2. tolongla.

things that are hard but didnt kill me, makes me stronger. so, either ill die or become stronger. i will see.

listening to emergency by paramore.